{a List}

It always happens when I have the most to do and am under the most stress.  I start thinking BIG.  What are my overarching life goals?  What makes me happy?  What do I hate?  What can I do right NOW to help me reach those goals?  In times of strife, it helps to make a list...

Things I like:

 - Sleeping in (well, really it's that I hate getting up anytime before 7:30-8 am)

 - Planning events with enough notice to not be rushed but not so much that it's dragged out (but definitely being involved from the beginning!)

 - Running the show (being in charge...shocker, right?)

 - Playing with linen, china, floral, and lighting - the pretties!

 - People who follow through on what they say they will do

 - Mild weather (73-77 degrees during the day and upper 50s to mid 60s at night sounds perfect!)

 - Water.  Being near water makes my heart beat stronger.  Lake, ocean, whatever.  

 - Balance between using my brain and using my hands

 - Working with highly respected, genuine people. 

Things I hate:

 - Traffic and driving around everywhere

 - Being over-committed and having to schedule every moment of my life

 - Accounting and budgets

 - Bugs

 - Game playing, politics, and drama for no good reason

 - Monotony 

 - Waste and pollution

My response at first glance is that I am definitely doing the right thing by being in school now and focusing on my dream of opening an event venue.  I keep telling myself that the craziness I go through for school and for my job(s) and for my volunteer leadership positions all works towards my goals of operating a SUCCESSFUL business in the future.  However, what if I don't stay in Texas?  I don't know if my "perfect property" will be here.  I want to stay close to my family and who knows where my personal life may lead, but I don't know if being in D/FW is going to lead me to my ultimate stress-free, rewarding and sustainable life.  

What can I do right now to make my life easier?  Well, I can't work less because I sure as heck need money to live.  I could find a 40-hour a week job that pays my bills better and doesn't require me to "think about work" when I'm at home, but I know I won't be happy.  I could reduce my drive time and commutes by trying to get all the parts of my life closer together.  But that would mean moving to Dallas and probably having to leave TWE, and I don't/can't/won't do that.  I could drop out of the leadership roles I have, but that would mean damaging some personal relationships and lessening the professional benefits I am getting from these positions. 

See?  So, what is a girl to do except to keep pushing through this challenging time and trust that it will all work out in the end.  With the perfect property, perfect weather, and perfect clients.  

Related:  A homeowner at job #1 said she was going to the north Queensland area of Australia and that it's fall there, but that up there it's kind of always perfect.  Roadtrip, anyone?

{Dork Alert}

Yesterday, I filled up for the first time at Texas Biotech, a producer of high quality Biodiesel that is made from virgin and used vegetable oil.  I first heard about them through the Green Spot Market by White Rock Lake (a hearty jaunt from where I live in Fort Worth), but was told they only "sometimes" pump to the public.  Turns out they have an operating pump that is open Monday through Friday, 8am-5pm!  I stopped by yesterday on my way to school and it's right off of Highway 360 and I-30, only 4 miles from my parents' house in Grand Prairie. For.  The.  Win.  

When I stepped out of the car, I immediately got my first whiff of Biodiesel.  I volunteered at the PrairieFire Biofuels Coop shop on numerous occasions and that smell is ingrained in my memory.  I couldn't help but smile and talk excitedly to the business owner, Abraham, about my experience with Biodiesel.  Why am I so passionate about it?  I'll tell you..

A.  No oil and no war required to make Biodiesel.  

B.  You can cut down on your greenhouse gas emissions by nearly 80 percent with B100 Biodiesel.

C.  The oils they use are waste products from domestic farms that make other things, like food for human and animal consumption, glycerin for cosmetics, and oil for cooking. 

D.  Any diesel engine can run on Biodiesel...no conversions required!  

E.  Biodiesel is more corrosive than Petrol Diesel which means it will clean out your engine (and not leave gunky residue buildup) and it lubricates the engine to help it run smoother, quieter and more efficiently.

F.  Sure, it costs money to make Biodiesel and you have to use precious farm resources to grow the crops that make the oil, but it's a step in the right direction towards reducing our dependency on oil.  Trust me, I'm all over a solar powered car or an electric hybrid that can be charged using electricity made from wind or solar.  

G.  Finally, soy bean prices are what determines the price of Biodiesel, not oil.  Just last week, it was $2.99 a gallon compared to $3.99 or more at most pumps for diesel.  Even if it cost more than "dino-diesel", I'd still pay for it.  

H.  Sorry, one more thing.  I get nearly 50 mpg.  That's right.  Uh huh.

Ok, now that I've thoroughly convinced you to tell all your friends to use Biodiesel (if they have a diesel engine vehicle), let's get down to business.  A bumper sticker!  I had a great one from PrairieFire that said "Biodiesel Powered" and I always got lots of compliments and questions.  After I moved back to Texas, though, I couldn't find a convenient source for Biodiesel and I started to feel like a hypocrite, so I took it down.  Now that I am confident in my ability to always have B99 in my car, I need a new bumper sticker!  Vote on your favorite below by making a comment to the blog...  

{Home Stretch}

The first semester is coming to an end and I have several big projects coming due.  The first one is the completed business plan for my Starting a Business class.  This is the culmination of all the other projects: The Opportunity Paper, the Revenue and Expense Forecasts, the Proforma Financial Statements, and the Marketing Plan.  My partner is updating the financials then I have the honor of writing the laser-sharp 2-page executive summary.  I'm really too verbose, so it will be difficult.

I am both excited and sad for this class to come to an end.  Excited because I will walk away with a business plan that is 95% better than most business plans presented to banks and other sources of financing and I can move forward with my business dreams.  Sad because the goal for taking the MSE program as a whole was to get this plan together and I am afraid I will be disappointed (or wondering what the point is) with all the classes after this and will get antsy.  As I am oft to do.

After this plan is submitted, then I get to prepare for two big presentations.  One is the sales pitch of this business plan to REAL VENTURE CAPITALISTS.  This makes me very nervous.  And I have high hopes of a fancy video presentation or a beautifully designed PowerPoint template.  I fear I have tapped out many of my vendor connections already with this semester's projects, so I think I am just going to have to do the best I can with what I have.

The second presentation is for Organizational Behavior.  My study group picked 4 concepts that we will illustrate in a part live and part recorded presentation where I am the emcee / host.  It was sort of my idea, and I volunteered, but now I'm regretting it just a little. Mainly because I'm afraid of giving too much too soon.  Later in the year when I'm in a higher level class, am I going to wish I'd held onto this idea for later?  Oh well... I'm going for the glory!

{Note to Self}

Sometimes I have to remind myself why I do the things I do, like work two jobs plus running my own business from out of state, participate on the board of directors of a large, influential industry association, and try to lead a local networking group of another.  Oh yeah, and grad school.  Oh yeah, and freelance work in between.  Oh yeah, and some resemblance of a social life.  

So, in response to my throbbing head due to lack of sleep, I am laying out the following reminders to myself:

1.  Grad school is supposed to be hard and time-consuming.  It's designed that way and the experience is the same for all who are committed to it.  This also explains why the GMAT sucked so hard.  

2.  My participation in NACE and ABC is for the benefit of my current AND future career.  Investing time in these organizations will reap many more rewards.  I may loathe compiling that newsletter at times, but it will pay off.

3.  Working at OMP is "paid study time."  Seriously.  I am not going to find a better deal than the job I currently have working as a concierge for a luxury condo building.  I get to sit in a nice lobby, have unlimited access to a computer (I'm at work now writing this blog!) for personal use, have the boss actually support these other endeavors I pursue while on the clock, and gain contacts of affluent homeowners who might need an event planner.  Plus, I have a personal space heater.  Score!

4.  Though it doesn't feel like it, I actually do have a flexible schedule.  If I need to take my dog to the vet or go get acupuncture, the boss of job #2 allows me to do so.  I do make up for it by doing work on my own time at home and at job #1.  This is the ultimate benefit of being an entrepreneur and owning your own business.  You can work around life.  

5.  Social life, who needs it?  I actually do get quite a bit of social time in.  I eat at great restaurants, have a Rahr Bucking Bock at a local pub, attend community events, go dancing, glamorous parties (well, not so much anymore), and cultural activities (symphony, opera, etc).  What I'm realizing is that what I need most is...nothing.  I just need to sit at home with my boys and bake cupcakes with a movie on in the background.  No laundry, no studying, no appointments.  Maybe eventually I will find someone to join me in doing nothing, then all will be right with the world.